I haven't been blogging for a very long time, i know. Maybe the mood of blogging does come that often anymore because of activities that are consuming my time. Well this post will be about my random thoughts.
I had 3days intensive prayer seeking God for an answer especially for my degree course. It was difficult, extremely difficult. I felt so embarrassed that i can't even spend few hours with the person who love me so much, the person who sacrificed so much for me, & the person who is the reason why there is life in my inner being. He is a God who is full of grace and mercy. If its not about because of his grace i would definitely have failed in life to be honest. I am so thankful that he hears my cries during my prayer sessions. Pas Ann who is currently in England is also praying for me and she sends me verses through sms when she hears God's audible voice. How amazing huh. Most of the verses is about how i must seek him more. I must not seek him only when i have problems or when i want an answer but to seek him with all my heart everyday. He wants me to depend on him and not on human being. How many times we try to handle problems & situation that is beyond our human capability. We always THINK we can do it when the actual fact is we need our creator to help us through it. I think this is something we need to ponder.
Besides that, I've learned more about the people around me. You know one thing that i am so grateful for? Are the friends that i have around me. HONEST friends. You can have many friends who are fakers just for popularity sake, but ask yourself, deep down you know you want friends that will be at your side through thick and thin. Friends that will not gossip behind your back about you. As i faced trials, my friends were there for me. It may be small in number but they were there, and i am so glad to be assured that they will not go around spilling it out to others, i trust them simply because they are honest!
Sometimes its so hard to be different, don't you think? But i strongly believe that it takes one person to make that change. The world may hate you, the people may cast you aside but as long as you know what you're doing is right. I think its good that we continue to persevere on to do that is right and noble. Opening your mouth to speak what is right may seem that you are playing the bad person, but as long as you are doing it for the sake of others its all worthwhile and you will definitely find the satisfaction. I want to be different and not be like the norm, this is one of my desire for 2010.
